The Winds of Oldtown
by nikki298
Summary: A simple act, that if prevented, could have altered the history and Story of Westeros forever.


Have you ever wondered, What had happened that day, in Oldtown, when the Legend of Baelor breakwind was born?  
How much history could have been changed by one small act.

Something as simple as passing gas, changed the history of westeros as we know it. the hundreds of lives, lost.  
Entire Families destroyed or wiped from history.

This is the Story behind that fateful day. when wind, was all it took, to re write history.

Malora carefully arranged the bean paste treats unto the serving tray. She had to make sure that it will be timed right. She heard the servants talking that Baelor would have a private audience with Oberyn and Elia during tea time and it would be the best time to set her plans into motion.

While she found Elia tolerable, she did not wish for her to be the next mistress of Hightower. Yes, she finds her knowledge sufficient but, her weak body would undoubtedly be unable to provide sufficient heirs for the Hightower family. Her family's line cannot die out. Their legacy must be secured.

'And Baelor is utterly besotted with that weak girl.'

And Oberyn, 'he finds himself the most charming lad of sunspear. Well, what good is a pretty head when it is empty.' she loathed him. 'He prances around here charming all those petty servant girls inviting them to his bed late at night? Ugh. I can almost imagine the sudden sudden leave of servants due to pregnancies and the rise in bastard children in nine our dear stepmother thinks he is a suitable suitor for ME? I think not.' she sniffed.

Her plan was simple. Have her brother embarrass himself enough for the unsuitable guests to leave Hightower and move on casterly rock, and their lives would be back to the way it was. 'I can finally be back at father's side, doing what is really important.'

"Malora, are those sweets?" said a young voice. Malora turned around. It was Lynesse. 'Tsk. this child truly doesn't know her place.'  
"Children shouldn't meddle with things they shouldn't concern themselves with."  
"But Malora, those are sweets! I want some." Lynesse moved towards the tray.  
Malora quickly lifted it out of her reach  
"These are not for you Lynesse. These are for our dear brother, Baelor."  
"But I thought you had a fight with Big brother…?"  
"Mayhaps.."

Lynesse scrunched up her face, perhaps trying to think. "Malora, What in seven hells are you planning?"  
"Language, dear sister. It will not harm our dear brother. Well… not harm his body. His ego on the other hand is a completely different subject. Malora smiled fiendishly  
"That is mean. Malora. I am telling mother." she turned towards the door.  
"You speak of this, my dear lynesse, and i will tell father it was you who went into his room a fortnight ago. You know he doesn't like it when children meddle with his things."  
Lynesse turned to look at Malora. Her expression was pure horror. "T Wasn't I! That is a lei!" she cried.  
"Is it? I wonder who will father believe more?" Malora put down the tray of sweets. And walked towards Lynesse. She gripped the small girl's shoulders tightly. "You know father would believe me. You know he finds children like.. You, annoying and unnecessarily noisy. I wonder, how many lashes you would receive from his belt tonight?" She feigned thought.  
Lynesse was horrified. She closed her mouth and nodded her head. "I.. wont.. I won't speak of this to anyone.. Just please.. Don't tell father.."  
MAlora smiled sweetly. The kind of smile Lynesse didn't like seeing on her sister's face.  
"Good. now, leave. I will have your attendant bring you sweets in your room for tea."  
Lynesse left. But she prayed to the Mother that Whatever Malora had planned, it wouldn't be too much.

Baelor smiled warmly at his guests.

His Stepmother has arranged for him and Elia to have tea together at the garden pagoda while Oberyn served as chaperone. 'The boy loves his sister too dearly.' baelor thought. He would never understand how or why. There isn't much difference in age between Malora and himself but they differ too broadly to even get along. Sometimes, he wonders if they truly did come from the same womb.

"The weather here in Oldtown is very pleasant, Lord Baelor…" Elia smiled enjoying the soft breeze brought about by the sea.  
"Please, call me Baelor" he sat down opposite Elia and smiled at her. 'She truly is, beautiful.' he thought.  
"I find it rather humid. Too humid although I must admit Baelor, i can't say i can complain, for the weather has permitted such..." He smiled as a servant girl came in with their tea. "Exhilarating fashions for the women of the reach."  
"My lord?" the young servant girl offered Oberyn a coquettish smile.  
"Won't you come to my room tonight, my dear? There is a rather succulent dish i'd like to try before bed-"  
"OBERYN! Behave, please." Elia smacked oberyn in the arm.  
"I'm sorry Elia." oberyn winked at the young maid. She scurried off.

Oberyn settled down. Elia turned her attentions to Baelor who found Oberyn's attraction to the ladies of the reach amusing. 'Perhaps something we could use in the future to convince this fool to let her sister- and him, stay.'  
Women after all are one of the many fine wealths old Oldtown.  
"My Lord" A servant girl approached carrying a tray of peculiar looking buns. "Your mother has sent these for you and your guests to try out."  
"Guests as poison testers Baelor?" Oberyn teased.  
"Brother, do not be foolish, ofcourse Baelor or Lady Rhea would not allow such a thing." she smiled at Baelor."  
"Yes! Why yes ofcourse, my mother wouldnt.." Baelor smiled. "Allow me to test it for "poison" Lady Elia"  
He picked one of the treats in question up and popped it into his mouth. Baelor stared deeply into Elias eyes as he chewed thoughtfully and swallowed. Elia blushed. She never would have thought chewing could look so.. Sexy. Oberyn rolled his eyes at the show. 'Oh gods, if you are real, let it be poison so that we may end this whole charade.' he thought.  
"There see? Not poisonous Although, the dessert itself seems quite.. Heavy, on the palette. Not something that would work well with the tea I had the servants prepare. Bring it back. Give it to the children- if they want it." Baelor told the servant girl who quickly left the pagoda to do as Baelor commanded.

"Now, where were we-!" Baelor felt something strange. He was sure he emptied his bowels after he woke up. Just like he is used to doing every day. Then why..? 'OH DEAR MOTHER OF GOD."  
Suddenly the air is cold. He felt his hair stand on ends. 'Is it poison? Was i poisoned?' he asked himself  
'No… no.. it doesn't feel like poison. It feels like…. A FART. a big one. Oh dear GODS. NO.'  
Baelor tried to act as if nothing was wrong. He slowly made his way over to the far side of the pagoda.

"Is everything all right Baelor?" Elia asked. She stood up to check up on him. He seemed to have paled considerably. Baelor tried to move downwind from Elia and Oberyn. If he could just pass a quiet one… that was all he needed. Just one long silent one…

"Everything is great, Elia! Why dont.. You.. uh.. Check out the roses over there? They're yellow! I mean uh.. Gold!"  
"What is wrong with you?" Oberyn asked, his eyebrows raised. "Are you… ACTUALLY Poisoned?"  
"N-No.. no.. Just uh.. It's a little warm today isn't it?" baelor stammered. He tried to carefully relax his buttocks.

"Baelor, if anythings wrong.. I can call the maester…" Elia tried to move past Baelor

"NO!"

Everything happened too quickly. His yell let out a wet sound. The baritone of his anus loud and clear.  
Baelor couldn't comprehend what he was feeling Relief for the offending act has relieved him of his stress, Mortification for he has done so infront of his WOULD HAVE BEEN future bride.

The winds changed direction. It carried a smell so foul it reminded the martell siblings of the streets of kings landing after a particularly bad plague. Elia quickly shut her mouth close and covered her nose and mouth with her hand. Oberyn Let out a laugh. He couldn't help himself. He didn't want to, he didnt want to take in more of baelor's wind through his nose but the look of outmost horror on Baelor's face was enough to get him crackling. Tears started leaking from his eyes. He couldn't tell if it was due to the foul odor or the laughter.

"I.. have.. To go check on.. Uhm… my mother. " Baelor whispered. He quickly turned face and fled the pagoda.

He is ruined. he has ruined his chances with Elia. His chances of marrying a princess gone.

"Well. I guess Breakwind Baelor didn't get poisoned after all." Oberyn said after he managed to calm himself down to talk."  
Elia looked at his brother. Then started laughing. 


End file.
